No happy holiday text messages! Stop already!
It’s 9:02 central time and I have already received 19 holiday text messages. 19!!!!
Just stop it!
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Monthly Archives: December 2008
So this Christmas and many others has been awkward due to one thing—I am gay.
Yes, my family knows but it has always been a military thing, don’t ask and don’t tell. Over the past couple of holidays the awkwardness has grown due to my intolerance of their passive acceptance.
Yesterday I found myself surrounded by my aunts and my mom’s friends conducting a Q&A on what, why and how I am gay. One aunt had tears in her eyes. The other aunt was stuck on the bible and compared my situation to any other sin, which makes me not a lost cause. Thanks! One of my mom’s friends was strangely intrigued by it all as she kept asking the most intimate questions about me and my wife. I was asked questions like: Are you the man and she’s the woman? Don’t you want kids one day? How do you know it’s not a phase? How do you guys do the do? How did you meet her? Were all the womyn in your life gay too? Who turned you out to this mess? Why do you want to break your momma’s heart?
It saddens me that I cannot be myself without this kind of reaction, but I have to remind myself that I have been given the privilege of being the LIGHT. So I answered ALL questions. Yes, even the intimate ones. Why? Well, in order to ask for change, you have to be the change. I have to stand in their face and show them what a gay person looks like. Most importantly, I have to show them what a gay person that they loved and watched grow up looks like. Regardless of who I am with or not with, I am gay. Period the end. They cannot pray it away. They cannot hate it away. They cannot force me into a place where I am quiet about who I am.
At the end of the day I was exhausted but more empowered by it all. I’m sure there will be a round 2 today with my other family members so I need to get ready.
Guys, I have tried to hold it in as long as I could, but there is something about that little Smith child that I do not like! He just looks like a jerk! That curly hair and ice scream skater look is quite annoying and it looks forced. I hate to pick on the kids but this boy is going to need a lot of therapy when he realizes that he’s a lame in his late twenties. Yes, it will take that long.
You’re trying too hard son. We don’t believe you! YOU NEED MORE PEOPLE!!!
Very funny…
So I watch The View whenever possible now because of Whoopi Goldberg. She brings such a balanced intellectual voice of reason to a show that was once very caddy, campy and preachy. Even when I do not agree with Whoopi, which does not happen quite often, I listen to her point of view because she clearly articulates her position in such a fair way. She does not subscribe to a specific agenda like Rosie O’Donnell who could not see pass her sexuality most of the times or Elisabeth Hasslebeck who cannot think outside of her conservative Fox news think box.
The thing I love the most is that she does not change for anyone. She created her own lane in the entertainment business by being herself. She’s brown, natural and intelligent. There are not many like her in the industry. Even on The View she wears whatever the heck she feels like wearing which is mostly jeans, t-shirts and converses. She has mastered the gay flare and I love it. She is like that closet rebel that leads through action. She is not the loudest. She is flashy. She is not adamantly dogmatic. However, she commands respect through her refusal to conform. We can learn a lot from her. Lead by example and never go against your core.
Kudos to Whoppi Goldberg for officially being one of the Kool Kids at Lucky’s Joint.
No words.
A week from tomorrow we will be loading up my car and heading west to visit our families for the holidays. Tonight we stepped out for a quick pizza run and both admitted again that we are dreading the holidays a bit. We love our families but we really wish we could stay in Atlanta and just do us for Christmas. Instead I will be in Dallas and she’ll be in Little Rock. Being that this is our first holiday together we are going to honor our commitments made prior to us, but damn it is not what we want to do.
I think if we were hetero our parents and families would understand why we would choose to be together in Atlanta for the holidays. Also, the fact that we sprung our marriage on them out of the blue would not make matters better to bail. So we’re giving the families this last Christmas before we start to create our own holiday traditions…
This is really cute…watch!
This is sooo going to be our kid.
Last Friday night we found ourselves in a dark little coffee bar/restaurant smoking cigarettes and drinking coffee. We had dinner earlier that evening with another couple and we just wanted a quick nightcap before closing out the night.
The thing I love about being married is that I have a built in friend. Listen, I do not think you should do marriage any other way really. I repeat: You have to marry your friend. I heard that said many many times before but I have never really understood that until now. Yes, my life is different than it was, but in such a beautiful way and that is because I married my friend. I married someone that gives me that perfect balance for me. I can be my whole self and not pieces. You know how you are with someone but you hide parts or habits from that someone because they may judge you or not like it? There is nothing I cannot do with her. I find that the old things I used to do for “fun” interest me even less than they did before. My fun now is doing anything and everything with my most favorite person, my wife.
